five months

Its me and bobby's five month anniversary :)

I'm extremely happy!! :)

We don't have much planned for today, but he's on his way over to pick me up and we're going to ihop!! woooot!

after ihop...i have nooo idea what we're going to be doing, but we both have the day off and we're going to spend all of it together! yay!!!

things are back to how they used to be, its good. No more of that weird week where there was kind of edginess...


...dude, i am starving!!! i want strawberry french toast!!!! ahhhh!! :P yum yum!

IBS

....So, i think i have IBS. (irritable bowel syndrome)

It runs in the family apparently.

Went on webmd.com and looked up the symptoms and treatments about it all. (its a great website btw). I matched almost every single on of the million symptoms on there. @_@. uggggh. I think its more prominent now because of my stress levels (my work, financial situations, dealing with dad, moving in w/ my boyfriend etc.)

just alot of things are going on right now and its kinda stressing me out.

Like tonight, I had a mini pizza at work and within 1o minutes I was having abdominal problems that wouldnt subside for several hours. uggggh its so painful!!

More than likely this is all due to IBS, but i have a sneaking suspicion i might also have a stomach ulcer. Just, for the past month and a half whenever i eat my stomach is always giving me discomfort. >_<

anyhow, i'm going to do what mom told me to and try to treat it at home first and avoid the doctor, but if my symptoms remain the same--i'm going to need to see a doctor within this next week.

ugggg,

I think i'll try to destress myself. Meditate everyday and relax more and stop fretting over little things. :)

anyhow, i'm exhausted and need sleep.

g'night. ;)

ice scraping escapade

Soooooo...due to the inclement weather in Frisco, I closed down my building early around 9:45. :P I then left at 11:45.

I walk outside and almost fall on my ass from the ice covering the parking lot @_@.

I get to my car. and alas, the keyhole to my door was completely iced over. joy.

so i got out my work keys and scraped at that for awhile until i could stick my car key in there to unlock my damn door. Then, i throw everything in my car and get out my lame ice scraper and start to go at it on my front windshield. The ice was about 1/2-3/4 inch thick. I stood out there in the freezing rain for twenty minutes trying to get somewhere with the front of my windshield. Meanwhile, there were these idiotic guys zooming around the parking lot in their suv and skidding everywhere on the ice. Later on... they decide to stop near me and help me with my car. (i had progressed to getting a fourth of my windshield uncovered within those 20 minutes. )

i swear, these three guys were severely high. their eyes were all red and they were talking real wierd. kinda scared me for a bit... but, they were really nice enough to stop and help me out, or else i would've been out there for a good 50 min. more or so.

So, after they had finished helping me out i thanked them and went on my way. and then it took me an hour and ten minutes to get home. with extremely cold, wet feet no less... >:[(thank you terrible shoes w/ holes in the bottoms....)

I'm fucking pissed with texas weather. i've had enough of this. (just winter mainly...) my car freaking pisses me off too.... it can't even effing defrost my windows AT ALL!!! grrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm so frustrated..and tired...and cold.

damn. i'm going to take an angry nap now. >:[

Hostilities

To top off a rather emotional week...-_-

I've been getting into a couple of quarrels with Bobby. It really makes me sad. We promised we'd never get into arguments, but sometimes (really, just this past week) We've had a couple of ups and downs... I won't get into it, I think we're both just kinda tired and stressed is all, but i hope beyond anything that we will never be like what we've been this past week. :[

Its good though to know what annoys eachother, so that when we're moved in together we can avoid all this messiness...

I love him so much. I don't want to get him upset over silly things i do. :( It scares me though that we might end up unhappy later on. I DONT WANT THAT! AT ALL!!! :'(

ahhhh, i'm afraid.

One decision can change your path

I feel outside of the sisters at times...

With my new decisions, becoming someone different than I thought I would be.

Moving in with Bobby is such a huge step--I never thought I'd get this far with anyone...especially with my first relationship, but it feels right.

I live in Texas, on my own, away from everyone else. I still live with my Dad--who i avoid at all cost. Trying to relate to him is a challenge, and every day I spend living with him gets worse and worse. Its not terrible, i suppose i'm still slightly rebellious because i don't care about him, but still--i really want to move out. February 16th can't come any quicker. Soon, i'm going to feel really alienated once I tell Dad about who I'm moving in with. Not that i care if he never talks to me again, in fact, that would be excellent. At the same time though, not really having any family around sucks.

But, I do have Bobby and his family. :)

I really miss everyone. I miss the most random wierd things that we always talked about and did together. I feel like i'm becoming less of a person without those witty remarks from char, tiffany's awesome obsessions that i truly envy, nikki's crazy awesome ambitions etc.

I keep relating back to my past, and missing it more and more.

I've distanced myself from all of my friends. I don't have good friends at work anymore, I rarely ever talk to my old school friends. I dont' know what to do with myself. Am i just becoming this huge loner, who relies on her boyfriend for every bit of social insight? I need a friend again. It scares me if in some other freak world, bobby and i weren't together anymore. what would i do?? Who would i go to? Where would my life go?

I'm just really scared of more changes i guess....